Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Today's Etiquette Lesson


Do you ever have to attend one of those fancy dinners with ridiculously complex place settings? Are you always confused about whose bread plate is whose and which water glass is yours? I used to be. But then someone taught me a great way to remember how it all works.

Just ask yourself two simple questions:

1. Who eats ritzy dinners like this every day? Rich people.

2. What do rich people drive? BMWs.

And that's all you have to remember! BMW = Bread, Meal, Water. BMW is the order in which your bread plate, meal plate and water glass are located in front of you as you sit at the table.

Easy-peasy pumpkin-squeezy!

38 comments:

Barfly said...

Great idea One Who Seeks,
It's hard to justify getting out all those dishes when I just eat a single protein, a starch, and beer in a can.

IE: Chicken wings, fries, beer. Or Ribs, mac-n-cheese, beer.

So maybe it should be PSB? Not as sexy as a car...

jadedj said...

What about Mercedes drivers? I'm confused.

Jane said...

Great info! Now we just need some lessons in proper toothpick etiquette and we're all set, lol!!

Snap said...

LOL! Too True!

laurie said...

I'm so glad I have smart friends like you,,, now I'm all prepared! lol!!!!

mxtodis123 said...

Now, that is a brilliant idea.
Mary

Victoria said...

You are so fab..i am giggling..
V~

knitwit said...

Having been to a number of interminable fancy mess dinners with my husband, I think I'm okay now on which plate to put my bread on. What I really need to know is which fork to use to stab that one guy at the table who won't stop talking in detail about WWII military strategy. I suppose I could just play it safe and hit him in the face with my water goblet.

Hippy Jersey Devil said...

I've never been invited to those kinds of dinners, hmmmmmm, wonder why.

I wipe my hands of it though, because I don't wanna go.

Easy Peasy Pumpkin Squeezy ; )

mermaid gallery said...

great way to lose an appetite...(like seinfeld says...."How can you actually lose an appetite?)...this is how!

DEZMOND said...

I remember this next time queen Lizzy invites me for brunch :)

Workingdan said...

Catchy way to remember. If I ever find myself dining like a rich person, I will surely remember this.

But that is unlikely to happen...me and the rich don't get along very well!

Caroline said...

LOL!!! I go for the fork and knife closest to the plate! If I had to navigate this at dinner, I would freak out!

Jeanne said...

A truly great (and unique) way to remember what is what and where it is! :0)

Southpaw said...

I love the acronym! Does anyone sever meals that fancy still?

Yvonne said...

I've been to a few fancy dinners with too many utensils and stuff, and not many knew what was for what, so if I ever go to another fancy dinner I will try and remember this, but probably won't with my memory. Maybe I could take a picture of it with me, would that be good etiquette? LOL I'm not even sure I spelled etiquette right! snort tee hee :)

Sarah said...

LOL I loooove that! My Mom was born in 1923 to a wealthy family. She went to boarder school etc etc...we learned it all at home..until we had it LOL! I love this..am not rich..but I think now after years of not using this..I could make it through a fancy dinner! Thank ya hon:)

Francie said...

Thanks, but where do I put the bag from Tim Horton's?

Birdie said...

I am surprised with myself because I actually knew all of them except the fish course. I have no idea where I picked it up.

Copyboy said...

Those rich crazy folks with fork problems.

My Grama's Soul said...

I'm sure in my lifetime...I've picked up the wrong fork more than once....If that is the worst sin I accomplish..i think I've done pretty well...don't you? LOL LOL

Jo

Bersercules said...

Thanks for this! This is gonna help me some day! BMW!!

Linda in New Mexico said...

This comes for me at a perfect time. Thanks universe!!! My grands love to have sit down dinners and I have been having them set the table themselves. I was taught this placement in college (sorority) and want them to have the comfortable feeling if the occasion arises and if not....we can play at high brow dinners anyway. They will love your placement picture. Thanks my dear. Oma Linda

Tricky Nag said...

Now you need to explain the seafood, meat, salad thing. I always thought you worked your way from out to in with utensils, but if I did that that would mean the salad would come after the meat course. Do rich people eat their salad last?
Thank goodness I'm a simple girl who gets excited at the thought of eating at Boston Pizza.

sophie...^5 said...

What if you drive a Cadillac?

Plowing Through Life said...

I attended such a function once and I was totally lost. The only thing I could do is watch the people at my table to see what they were doing - then copy them. I'm thankful for my simple life where you can just enjoy your food without all this nonsense!

Beatnheart said...

I’ll bet I’ll never need to know this.

Em said...

Here, all the wannabe rich junior executive type people drive BMWs (or Mercedes - you could commit a crime here in a black Mercedes and never, ever get caught, they're everywhere.) Oh, also mistresses. (Um, not crime committers just Beemer/Mercedes drivers. Or maybe both. How would I know?)

The really, really rich people either drive beaten up old cars/trucks, Priuses or Rolls Royces. (Tackiest cars on earth.)

Let's see B (beaten up) Bread. P (Prius) Primary Meal, R (Rolls) Refreshment!

Mnemonic Hollywooood style, baby!

Em said...

Tricky Nag:

Salad served in formal European service is served after the main meal and before the cheese course. It's fish, meat, salad, cheese, desert. So that's a European tablewear setting.

In the US it's salad, fish, meat, cheese, desert.

I know. Totally weird thing to know. I've waited tables in some fancy places. ;)

mistress maddie said...

Yes, I did know this and when I have my dinner parties, I send this out with the invites!!!

DWei said...

This only serves to remind me of the fancy dinner that I attended with my girlfriend last week.

I proceeded to use my coffee spoon as a makeshift knife to cut some cake. Clearly I am a classy gentleman.

Riot Kitty said...

Or...people who work at nonprofits and have to put on these dinners as fundraisers. Or go to other nonprofit dinner fundraisers and try not to fall asleep ;)

Annie said...

What happens when I know but the person next to me doesn't?!

YELLOWDOG GRANNY said...

Probably the only thing I remember from Home-Ech. That and how to put in a zipper..I do have cause to use the zipper instructions, but never been to a sit down dinner where I had that setting..thank the Goddess.

brandi said...

~something i was never taught...i get so confused but you just made it all so clear!!! usually i just let my sister~in~law set the table...family dinners at in~laws are the only time i am put to the test...now i can step up to the plate!!! much love light and blessings~

Jim said...

Thanks for clearly that one up! lol
I always move that bread plate to my right side. I wonder what the rational was for placing it in the OPPOSITE corner from my right hand!? Ok OK...my apologies to you lefties!
Besides that Debra, I loved this and all the formal stuff....probably due to my 'very informal' upbringing.

laughingwolf said...

hmm... thought twas: bread/meat/wine

lol...

at home, it's wherever the damn things fit on my overflowing computer desk... the dining table is full of crap, including the 40# bag of dog food, radio, toaster, etc

Life As I Know It Now said...

wow, that does make it all easier to remember. now I just have to get invited to a fancy-smancy dinner and I'm all set :)