Crown Prosecutor: If it please Your Lordship, this is a sad and tragic case. Debra She Who Seeks stands before you today accused of the offence of being willing -- nay, eager -- to wear, contrary to the law of good public taste, any or all of these outrageously tacky t-shirts as pictured recently on the internet:
I file as Exhibit "A" this incriminating photograph taken in June 2013 at the City of Hamilton in the Province of Ontario. In it you can quite clearly see that the accused publicly wore, in the presence of two or more witnesses, her favourite cat t-shirt of a similar kind and nature as the offending t-shirts in question.
The accused's criminal proclivities being self-evident, I submit therefore that you have no option but to convict the accused of bad fashion sense and questionable judgment. Milord, the Crown rests.
The Court: Counsel for the defence, you may present your case.
The Defence: We are in no position to offer any evidence in rebuttal, Milord. Res ipsa loquitur -- "the thing speaks for itself."
The Accused: Hey, WTF am I paying you for, asshole? I'm being railroaded here -- railroaded, I tellz ya!
The Court: Order! Order in the court! Guards, taser the accused!
Some time later, after the accused regains consciousness, the Court renders judgment: