Friday, 3 June 2022

Gay and Grey


Being an LGBTQ+ oldster is a lot different than being a young queerling, that's for sure. We are not at the centre of our community anymore like we were "back in OUR day." Nor are we on the cutting edge or on the front lines. Different queer issues, viewpoints and priorities are taking centre stage these days. Some of us are curmudgeonly about it and begrudge our loss of control, influence and status in the community. "You young whippersnappers," we want to yell. "Get off my lawn, you goddamn kids!"



Our generation -- the first one in history to come out in huge numbers -- is justifiably proud of the struggles we went through, the battles we fought, the firestorms we survived, and all that we achieved over the decades.






The younger generations of the LGBTQ+ community benefit today from the victories we won, but it is their turn now to lead the community and fight for the next set of advances while protecting current rights. And I know that they will be up to the task. I support them all the way!

But that doesn't mean that we LGBTQ+ elders are all now out to pasture. There's still lots of living to do! 

Rock on, my fellow queer oldies but goodies -- rock on!



38 comments:

  1. Yep....and while im not too old yet....the younger generation should stop and listen to the tales of the older generation when they get the chance. They will hear the history straight from the horse's mouth. The tales of learned and heard are priceless.

    The San Fran. Picture still gets me everytime.

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  2. because of course, the private investigators and police don't masturbate.

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  3. I love that meme about gay marriage,” if you are opposed…” It says it all. Live and let live people!

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  4. Dispatches from the trenches! Go you, Debra.

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  5. Oh, never too late.
    Never too old.
    Never stop fighting.
    The struggle continues. I think Millennials did find a path burned to follow but the fight continues. I love Pride month and I love that people remember Stonewall and that it was Black and Brown Trans women of color who started the fight. But people need to look back (like that photo of the SFGMC) and learn how to fight.
    I'm a Queen Bee. And I'm still stinging mad.

    Happy Pride!

    XOXO

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  6. Build on our legacy, and go boldly into the future!

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  7. I salute you and your generation in everything you've acheived. There is still work to be done but you can leave the lion's share of that to those younglings who benefit from the work and sacrifice your generation and those before have given. I stand with you all, at your side always.

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  8. I love the Veteran Pin. I want one.

    The SF Gay Men's Chorus one breaks my heart.

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  9. I especially loved the "Follow me for more life tips" one!!

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  10. I have 2 gay grandsons, many gay friends, and the "gayness" never comes up. They are all people that I love and enjoying being around.

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  11. It boggles my mind how things have become better (even though it's by no means perfect - I'm looking at you Florida). I'm glad my children live in a world that accepts them more and gives them a chance to grow old and proud of who they are.

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  12. I guess it is never to late to come out!

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  13. I presume that "The Management" is God? And that reading your blog qualifies as "lewd conduct"?

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  14. “If you’re opposed to gay marriage...” That’s excellent.

    I’m here. I’m queer. Again, I’m HERE, not invisible.

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  15. The veteran pin would push a few people over the edge!

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  16. It's so good times are changing

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  17. great advice on gay marriage. I'm only against BAD marriages but you don't know until you are in one. My first one didn't work out well.

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  18. @ Old Lurker -- I had a good chuckle at the idea that my innocent little blog might be considered "lewd." Ooooo, talk dirty to me some more, Lurkie!

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  19. That choir photo is so sad, Debra. I remember the "gay cancer" that had my gay friends scared when I lived in Garden Grove, CA in the late 70s. At least things are more hopeful on that front. The "Two Granpas" book should be in every classroom, because a lot of our classrooms have kids with gay family members or kids who are gay themselves. What happened in Florida recently has me furious and sickened. I won't go to Florida unless I have to pass through it because of a flight. I admit that briefly I was a little uncertain about gay marriage, and then I thought what the hell is wrong with you, Louise? People who love each other and want to get married should be able to, regardless. You know that I adore Ron and Jim. I can't wait to see them this summer! They've been together almost 50 years, and they have a more committed and loving relationship than most heterosexual couples. You have taught me so much over the years, and I'm grateful for that, my friend! Hugs to you!

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  20. The San Fransisco choir is heartbreaking. I love the 90 year old!

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  21. "queer oldies but goodies" needs to be on a t-shirt. Also, I love that pin!

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  22. I guess it's never too late..Good for them..Good post Deb!!! Enjoy your weekend

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  23. Hope you've stocked up on Ben-Gay for your golden years, Deb!

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  24. @ Tundra Bunny -- Ben-Gay, GROAN, good one!

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  25. Yes, lewd. I seem to recall somebody posting a picture of her leg covered in nothing but SEE-THROUGH cling wrap. The subsequent propositions and marriage proposals would have made a sailor blush.

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  26. San Francisco Gay Men Choir. That broke my heart. I hid in Utah and fell in love with a straight boy. We were heroes and our thing was exploring the country. He was straight,but that didn't stop us. We were exploring the country.

    One time, a friend told me it is good you are living here. Because AIDS would get you. I still don't know what to think about that. I guess i am a survivor.




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  27. I don't need to be the center of a community. Just the freedom to be queer is enough.

    That said, I do feel more strongly about the political side to it than ever before, and it does anger me that there are those trying to turn back a clock that was running kind of slow to begin with.

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  28. I must say more. I am an old gay man and i have something to say. We were heroes. It took me almost 20 years to "come out"
    to this friend. I was afraid he wouldn't love me anymore.
    I was afraid he wouldn't understand.
    Finally he said it. Are you gay? I said yes. He said that's ok.
    After all that we had seen and done, gay or straight was the least of our worries.

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  29. @ Richard -- I'm glad you're a member of our community! That's nice to learn!

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  30. That choir photo is so tragic. I was about to copy it and use it when I wondered if it would be viewed negatively, as if I'm suggesting something about it being a gay disease. I don't know if people still think like that. Perhaps I'll just use my rainbow-cardi photo from your contest last year to say Pride.

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  31. Living in San Francisco in the very early 90s had difficult times - we all knew people who had died from aids. And at that point the disease moved quickly. I lived in Noe Valley - the other side of the Castro Hill. It is a beautiful part of the city and a place I miss. I will say I am very glad my girls are free to be their true selves, although with all the backwardness of the Supreme Court who knows what comes after Roe v Wade

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  32. We have made some progress over the years.

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  33. I'm one- handed typing this as I ice my left wrist. Earlier this week it was my right ankle... lol. Getting old is no joke. But, being old and gay is wonderful. I live in a liberal bubble where I feel safe to be my true self. I know that is not the case for so many of my LGBTQ family, and I wish they could live as freely as I do. Mind you, I'm extra careful when I find myself in 'red' country. I keep telling myself that it's getting better.
    Great memes, as always!
    (e)

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  34. Such a great post! You are in the age group of trailblazers! Loved the one about refusing a gay proposal marriage. Makes me laugh every time. My husband says something similar when people mention being opposed to gay marriage. Let people live their lives and mind your own flippin' business!

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  35. Love and support for all the elders and trailblzers!

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  36. Love this last one. Sweet, proud old man. Wish I could give him a big hug.

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  37. a generation of old gay people; first ones. Curious to see how this goes.

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  38. If you don't approve of it, don't do it. But leave the rest of us out of your morality, please.
    That seems to be going down the tube these days.

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