It's Santa's Big Night!

OF COURSE SANTA IS REAL!

And he's got the SWEETEST GIG in the world.

He only works ONE DAY PER YEAR,

the lucky bastard.

And THESE DAYS, it's even

LESS EXERTION --

And speaking of AMAZON --

Yes, with its SURVEILLANCE ALGORITHMS,

Amazon would probably be better

at bringing us OUR HEART'S DESIRE

than Santa's old-fashioned methods --

But Santa still enjoys a pretty 

STELLAR reputation.

Of course, like anyone, 

Santa DOES have his FAULTS, 

such as:

✻ Endorsing some DUBIOUS PRODUCTS

✻ Not always being 

the BEST EMPLOYER

✻ Dumping MRS CLAUS 

during a MID-LIFE CRISIS

 

Hmmm, 

he and Jeff Bezos 

actually have a

LOT IN COMMON,

don't they!