I have a friend who is a geologist and she'd disagree about rocks making lousy friends. Apparently, they keep pretty quiet, which is what she looks for in a friend.
I love shit... I mean this. Those spelling errors! I wish I had thought about it; I would have had it proofed. (The had hads and would have hads drive my Spanish friends crazy.)
Thanks for making me smile today, friend D … Much love, cat. (The pic from my last post is a couple years old with Albert, a friend's cat comforting me when me was a bit sick.)
Oh my gosh! Debra, I just read half of these to my hubby. The MIB one literally made me laugh out loud and so did the donating blood one. Thanks for my morning chuckle!
@ Elsie Amata -- Thanks! Just FYI, the comments function on your blog does not seem to be working today -- couldn't leave a comment despite my best efforts.
The hair stylist one is a little daunting. I mean, I cut my own hair, but that has NEVER come up in the history of hair stylists? Not even ONE has been looking for someone to pin a crime on?
Hello Debra, Since everything reminds me of something old, I though I would send you what is perhaps the ultimate word on hairs as crime evidence, by Stephen Leacock, the great Canadian humorist. (Sorry this is such a long comment, but I don't have an email address for you.) --Jim ======================================= AN IRREDUCIBLE DETECTIVE STORY: HANGED BY A HAIR OR A MURDER MYSTERY MINIMISED
The mystery had now reached its climax. First, the man had been undoubtedly murdered. Secondly, it was absolutely certain that no conceivable person had done it.
It was therefore time to call in the great detective.
He gave one searching glance at the corpse. In a moment he whipped out a microscope.
"Ha! ha!" he said, as he picked a hair off the lapel of the dead man's coat. "The mystery is now solved."
He held up the hair.
"Listen," he said, "we have only to find the man who lost this hair and the criminal is in our hands."
The inexorable chain of logic was complete.
The detective set himself to the search.
For four days and nights he moved, unobserved, through the streets of New York scanning closely every face he passed, looking for a man who had lost a hair.
On the fifth day he discovered a man, disguised as a tourist, his head enveloped in a steamer cap that reached below his ears. The man was about to go on board the Gloritania.
The detective followed him on board.
"Arrest him!" he said, and then drawing himself to his full height, he brandished aloft the hair.
"This is his," said the great detective. "It proves his guilt."
"Remove his hat," said the ship's captain sternly.
They did so.
The man was entirely bald.
"Ha!" said the great detective without a moment of hesitation. "He has committed not one murder but about a million." ==================================
I am a little behind and trying to catch up. You are always good for a chuckle! Sam Elliot is a long time Love of mine.. I wish. As always, thanks for sharing your sense of humor.
@ Parnassus (Jim) -- I love this, thanks! I'm a Leacock fan (as are most Canadians of a certain age) but I don't think I've ever read this before. It is CLASSIC Leacock humour!
47 comments:
You gave me quite a memory this morning....and a chuckle. Pet rocks. I do remember having one. Oh, the fads we went through when we were young.
the flip flops one - HELL YES! especially if you're of the male gender!
Had had had had.
Killed me.
But sliders are okay then?
Back in the Uk and enjoying your blog again! Today was a good day.
These are good!
I have a friend who is a geologist and she'd disagree about rocks making lousy friends. Apparently, they keep pretty quiet, which is what she looks for in a friend.
And they're good back-up in fights, too.
Lol. Great start to the day, Debra.
I’m still laughing, my favourite is toss up, no,, I love them all!
The Most logical opinion I've read ALL morning! xo
LOL.. I love your sense of humor :-)
but but I do like big feet in flip flops... nom nom nom...
Reminds me of this old chestnut--Punctuate the following:
John, where Mary had had had had had had had had had had had my approval.
A perfectly legal sentence, with a few alternative solutions for punctuation.
--Jim
@ Parnassus --OMG! That old chestnut is new to me though and I have no idea how to punctuate it so it makes sense!
Some true lols! Thanks for the morning chuckle...
Hi Debra, try this:
John, where Mary had had "had had", had had "had"; "had had" had had my approval.
You can regroup the quotes so that John wins, like one of those old puzzle records.
--Jim
Lol, thank you I needed these laughs today!
blessings,
Jill
These are so good my brain hurts!
@ Parnassus -- I am in awe. Thanks!
these are great!
Sam Elliot is a wise man.
Fantastic! The English language is so ridiculous. I am happy it is my first language so I don't need to learn it!
I now have an explanation for me crapy memory.
I love shit... I mean this. Those spelling errors! I wish I had thought about it; I would have had it proofed. (The had hads and would have hads drive my Spanish friends crazy.)
Mmmmm... Sam Elliot.
I'm stealing the MIB meme because it's just too true. It explains everything. I'm also stealing the Sam Elliot meme because, well, just because.
>^,^<
Thanks for making me smile today, friend D … Much love, cat. (The pic from my last post is a couple years old with Albert, a friend's cat comforting me when me was a bit sick.)
Good ol Rocky
That was quite funny.
Ha - loved the had had had had sentence! Funny!
HAHAHAHAHA! These were so good! The one about the hair stylist. BAHAHAHA... It is a little scary, too.
A good day for stupid, goddam things.
Thanks Debra!! LOL! My brain "thoughts" have been crazy for the past week! Needed this! Big Hugs!
The dog is cute. I like the one about English.
As a writer I loved the had had sentence, and the MIB one cuz it makes perfect sense, too :)
Oh my gosh! Debra, I just read half of these to my hubby. The MIB one literally made me laugh out loud and so did the donating blood one. Thanks for my morning chuckle!
Elsie
@ Elsie Amata -- Thanks! Just FYI, the comments function on your blog does not seem to be working today -- couldn't leave a comment despite my best efforts.
I laughed SO LOUD at the flip flops one. Seriously.
Oh these are DAMN funny! I lol'd all over the place with them today...
Thank you for a much needed laugh!
LOL- I love that you are as 'warped' as I am! Too funny!!!! xo Diana
stealing some...thanks..
and thank you for your generosity..you are the best and I adore you ..
The hair stylist one is a little daunting. I mean, I cut my own hair, but that has NEVER come up in the history of hair stylists? Not even ONE has been looking for someone to pin a crime on?
God damn! I love the flip flop.
If the shoes he had had had had ventilation we wouldn't have to look at him in flip flops.
the Ol'Buzzard
Hello Debra, Since everything reminds me of something old, I though I would send you what is perhaps the ultimate word on hairs as crime evidence, by Stephen Leacock, the great Canadian humorist. (Sorry this is such a long comment, but I don't have an email address for you.) --Jim
=======================================
AN IRREDUCIBLE DETECTIVE STORY:
HANGED BY A HAIR
OR A MURDER MYSTERY MINIMISED
The mystery had now reached its climax. First, the man had been undoubtedly murdered. Secondly, it was absolutely certain that no conceivable person had done it.
It was therefore time to call in the great detective.
He gave one searching glance at the corpse. In a moment he whipped out a microscope.
"Ha! ha!" he said, as he picked a hair off the lapel of the dead man's coat. "The mystery is now solved."
He held up the hair.
"Listen," he said, "we have only to find the man who lost this hair and the criminal is in our hands."
The inexorable chain of logic was complete.
The detective set himself to the search.
For four days and nights he moved, unobserved, through the streets of New York scanning closely every face he passed, looking for a man who had lost a hair.
On the fifth day he discovered a man, disguised as a tourist, his head enveloped in a steamer cap that reached below his ears. The man was about to go on board the Gloritania.
The detective followed him on board.
"Arrest him!" he said, and then drawing himself to his full height, he brandished aloft the hair.
"This is his," said the great detective. "It proves his guilt."
"Remove his hat," said the ship's captain sternly.
They did so.
The man was entirely bald.
"Ha!" said the great detective without a moment of hesitation. "He has committed not one murder but about a million."
==================================
I am a little behind and trying to catch up. You are always good for a chuckle! Sam Elliot is a long time Love of mine.. I wish. As always, thanks for sharing your sense of humor.
@ Parnassus (Jim) -- I love this, thanks! I'm a Leacock fan (as are most Canadians of a certain age) but I don't think I've ever read this before. It is CLASSIC Leacock humour!
That second one made me laugh out loud.
i am trying to keep my laughter limited to my room but i am sure her ears are not doing the same lol hahaha
you rock!
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