And Now, a Musical Interlude

Take a tip from the unicorn and have a laid-back weekend o' fun, everyone!

My One Athletic Ability

Well, after HRH's stinging rebuke yesterday, I feel compelled to write one final post on this topic to defend myself. I'm not a COMPLETE slug, you know. I do have ONE athletic ability.

It's true -- I cannot run, skate, throw, jump, kick or do any other thing requiring physical skill or endurance. When I was a kid at school, I was always picked third-last for sports teams (believe it or not, there were two other kids who were even worse at sports than me, the poor bastards). Nor do I really understand the point of sports or physical exercise. It's always been a mystery to me why people would want to spend their precious, precious leisure time engaging in such activities.

But on the other hand, I do have very good hand-eye coordination. So I'm not bad at pseudo-sports like shooting pool, which does not require any real athletic skill. Consequently I've invested a fair amount of time in becoming a decent pool player. Also, it gave me something to do when I was young and hanging out at the local lesbian bar hoping to meet chicks. There's only three ways to pass time at a gay bar -- drink, dance or shoot pool. I'm not much of a drinker or dancer, so that left only one thing.

But I might as well be ABSOLUTELY truthful. These days, I'd probably prefer racking up some lovely cupcakes instead --

Mmmm, cupcakes.

Participaction, HRH Style

Hello, Her Royal Highness the cat here. I just want to say the following about yesterday's post written by my person --

You humans are so friggin' lazy! You should emulate us cats. Except for the 20 hours per day that we spend sleeping, we are exercise fitness FANATICS. Watch this and learn, humans --



And hey, did you notice the product placement in that video? Give me a Temptations Treat right now or I'll claw you, I swear to Bast!

Participaction, My Style

All those years of having government fitness "participaction" commercials crammed down my throat and what good did they do me?

"Oh, let's go for a run!" says Debra She Who Seeks, never. Run? RUN?

But you know, I'm consistent. That counts for something, doesn't it?

Happy Victoria Day!

Pip, pip, fellow Canuckians, let's all celebrate Queen Victoria's birthday in style, shall we? NO, I don't mean with a two-four of brewskies, you great unwashed colonial lumberjacks! I mean with a nice cup of Earl Grey or darjeeling tea, what ho? NO, I'm not calling you a ho, fer chrissakes -- oh, I give up.

If Mr. T can dredge up some couth to celebrate this auspicious occasion, why can't we? Yes, I'm going to say it: I pity da fool.

Enjoy your statutory holiday, everyone!

Honk if you laugh!

Today for your consideration: a couple of funny car commercials!

A heavily edited version of this Fiat ad is currently playing on Canadian TV, but the original American ad is much better --



I always think of this Thai ad as "Father Knows Best."



Have a good weekend, everyone, and drive safely!

Hamlet Updated