Saturday, 31 October 2015
A Spooky Ancestral Samhain
Hello, Her Royal Highness the cat here. Why are you so surprised to see me? On this sacred night of Samhain when the Wheel turns and the Veil is thin, why shouldn't I be back from the dead and blogging again? Sheesh.
Tonight we honour our ancestors, those who lived and died before us, preparing the path for our glorious selves. Let me share a bit of my long genealogy with you, Humans, unworthy though you are.
As you know, many of my ancestors were quite rightly worshipped in Egypt as Gods and Goddesses. Unfortunately, things went rather downhill after that.
Still, my people made a good living in medieval Europe during the bubonic plague. Oh yes, the Black Death was a fine time indeed for us cats. Rats were positively thick on the ground back then, thick!
In the Elizabethan age, one of my pampered forebears lived high and mighty among the nobility . . .
. . . while at the same time, another blackguard ancestor of mine was the most piratical scum that ever shipped a handspike.
In Edwardian England, one of my female ancestors was a noted Suffragette who agitated tirelessly for female kitties' right to vote. The police did not need to force feed her in prison though, since no cat in her right mind would ever refuse to eat, no matter what the cause.
Yes, my forebears included common labourers working in the worst Dickensian conditions in those "dark Satanic mills" of poetic fame . . .
. . . and also included some of the biggest capitalist toffs you'd ever care to see. Those fat cats never lifted a paw or worked a day in their entire nine lives. Oppressing the purrletariat was their only pastime and they did so with enthusiasm.
And do you know that I even had an illustrious and intrepid explorer among my ancestors who circumnavigated the globe many times in search of fame and adventure!
But alas, my forebear who was ship's cat on the Titanic was not as fortunate.
Let's not forget that I've also had many noted entertainers in my family line. Oh, how the female kitties swooned for this big guy! Love Me Tender Vittles was his biggest hit.
Well, I hope you enjoyed reading about some of my family tree. I'm sure your genealogy is nowhere near as interesting as mine, yet you should honour your ancestors all the same, Humans. Take some time to think of them tonight and be thankful for their lives.