What being a cat owner really means

Childhood Friends: DeeDee

The first girl I ever had a crush on was DeeDee, a cute little blonde girl I met in Grade 1. We became best friends and often played together after school. We would act out scenes from our Dick and Jane readers, like the one pictured above. Oh, innocent fun!

Then, in Grade 3, I invented a sleepover game that involved taking off all our clothes, getting in bed and just enjoying how good the cool sheets felt on our naked bodies. That game was innocent fun too.

But I think DeeDee told her Mom about the game. The next thing I knew, DeeDee said she wasn't allowed to play with me any more, although she never specified why. I was heartbroken for a while but life went on.

When we hit high school, DeeDee went completely boy crazy and I mean completely. As a not-so-innocent enticement to the boys, she stopped wearing panties under her tight polyester slacks. I still think of her whenever I see a camel toe.

[Dick and Jane collage card entitled "Wheeeee" created by Todd and used with his permission. See more fab cards at Todd's Etsy shop, Paper Lunchbox, and visit his blog, Musings from a Manic Mind.]

Proctologists to the Rescue

Phew! That'll save me a trip to Walmart! Thanks, Downtown Baltimore Surgery Center!

Gutterballs Update

Yes, I rolled many, many gutterballs. On both sides of the lane. The first game I only scored a measly 52 points. The second, 55. So hey, I improved! My Rare One bowled about double my score. A couple of the lesbo chix were decent bowlers but most of us were duffers. That didn't stop us from having a blast though!

And as a surprise, there was a real Valentine's theme to our day! The woman who wore the most red received a prize of a $25 Tim Horton's coffee 'n donuts card. And we each received a gel rose that lit up and flashed like a light show. Holy moly! Then later at the pizza place, there were Lindt chocolate hearts placed beside all our plates and a fresh pink long-stemmed rose for each of us. The woman who organized this bowling get-together really went above and beyond!

And yes, we were both stiff the next day but in the most unexpected spot. My Rare One and I had sore glutes, LOL! Guess we need to get in better shape for next year's bowlarama.

Happy Valentine's Day!

I've always liked and enjoyed Valentine's Day, no matter whether I was single, madly in love, broken-hearted or whatever on that date. That's because I don't regard Valentine's Day as a holiday which celebrates only romantic love. That's MUCH too narrow a focus! To me, Valentine's Day celebrates love of family, friends and pets -- all the important ones in our life!

So even if there is no romantic dinner, roses or chocolates on any given February 14th, there is always an exchange of valentines with my Mom, sister and special friends. And of course, Her Royal Highness the cat sends valentines too. (I act merely as her secretary.)

And if there does happen to be romance that particular year also -- well, it's just the pink icing on the heart-shaped cake! But the absence of romantic love is no reason for anyone to think less of themselves on February 14th (or any other day). Nor is the presence of romantic love a reason for anyone to feel superior or more deserving.

Happy Valentine's Day, EVERYONE!

Gutterballs

So My Rare One and I are lacing up the ugly two-tone shoes and going bowling tomorrow afternoon! We only bowl once a year, though. We go with our gang of middle-aged but still wild 'n crazy lesbo chix. Watch out, Bonnie Doon Lanes, here we come!

And our bowlarama extravaganza will be JUST like this video, except with pizza afterwards:

And yes, while we are all indeed middle-aged, nobody has The Dude's facial hair, at least not yet. So don't even ask which one of us plays his role. Although I'd LOVE to have the opportunity to float down a bowling lane between the legs of all those Busby Berkeley beauties!

The Log Driver's Waltz

How could I discuss lumberjacks without also paying tribute to log drivers, those fabled men in plaid shirts who corralled the big log booms on Canada's rivers and rode them downstream to the lumber mills and pulp and paper mills? They spent their lives in a hazardous dance "birling down a-down white water."



Mechanization and huge logging trucks have now rendered log drivers obsolete. Although birling or log rolling is no longer a profession, it still survives today as a competitive sport in lumberjack competitions.