Tuesday, 19 October 2010

HRH Behind the Wheel

Her Royal Highness, my beloved cat, insists on driving the car whenever we go out to buy gushy food and kibble. She swears that she has a valid driver's licence but personally I've never seen it. However, I am sure she wouldn't lie to me about something like that.

Unfortunately, HRH is . . . hmmm, how can I put this? . . . a very aggressive driver. She tailgates, weaves in and out of traffic, leans on the horn constantly and keeps up a running barrage of abuse directed at other drivers.


When I implore her to calm down and take it easy, all I get from her is Major Attitude (or should I say Major Cattitude?) Sometimes I wonder if she's not high on catnip when she's behind the wheel . . . no, no, not even HRH would be that foolish.


And when I finally insist on taking over the driving and make her sit in the back seat, she keeps up her obnoxiousness unabated. If anything, it's worse because she tries to get me to do likewise!


I'm just dreading the day when we get pulled over by the police. HRH will undoubtedly try to claw her way out of the situation. Then we'll both end up in the hoosegow cooling our heels/paws (as the case may be).

Note to self -- remind my Rare One to keep bail money on hand at all times, just in case.

24 comments:

Jeanne said...

Oh My!! Have you discussed maybe having HRH attend a driving school? Or Anger management classes?
You could carry a newspaper or magazine with you to read (or rather hide behind) when you go out with HRH.

Judy said...

Hey HRH ...two paws on the wheel...

mxtodis123 said...

These cats are something else, aren't they? HRH has had more adventures this past year than I have had in a lifetime. LOL!!!
Mary

Cinner said...

ha ha, you never know when that bail money will come in handy. lol.

Aunt Amelia's Attic said...

Next time HRH needs a little holiday, have her speed down here. I LOVE her driving attitude! She's my kind of cat... driver... whatever... >,-)

Perhaps 'alter ego' is the word I'm searching for!!! >,-)

Aunt Amelia's Attic said...

Ooooooooooooooo!

New saying for me!

"Giv em teh paw!"

"Giv em teh paw!!!"

-evil giggles-

Snap said...

Too funny! I do love LOL kitty and HRH!!!!! :D :D :D

Mother's Moon's Message said...

reminds me of the old Saturday Night Live skit about Tootes the driving cat... He had bad driving habits as well.

sophie... said...

I'll send my piggy bank change if'n you need some....we 4 leggeds have to take care of our 2 leggeds, eh!

Elena said...

OMG do you know how hard it is laughing with a soar throat!! Awesome photos, she looks vicious. Yep, road rage. And love the dialogue.

Elena said...

Oops forgot to thank you for the great comment on my blog!

BugginWord said...

This isn't exactly related, but just wanted to let you know the consensus from yesterday was "Saskatoon" is a funnier word. Carry on.

SUZY8-TRACK said...

Who knew cats had such road rage!??

Laura said...

I love your silliness...I always am pleased to receive giggles that start deep down in my belly!

YELLOWDOG GRANNY said...

you need to either cut back or up the amount of 'nip'..ha

Wendy said...

LOL! I guess I have to tell my girl's no "catmobile" for them or they'll try crazy stunts like her royal highness. I don't even want them to see these photos, or they might be influenced to take matters into their own paws! ;)

Blueberry said...

Neither Royalty nor Britney Spears should be driving themselves. ;-)

Ocean Breezes and Country Sneezes said...

HRH needs Triple A, it comes with a bail card!!! LOL

Caroline said...

LOL...I love the middle picture! Oh gosh, thanks for the laughs today :)

Sarita Rucker said...

What, don't you trust your cat? You can ALWAYS trust your feline friend! And if she says she has a valid driver's license, I'm sure she has got one. ;)

lol

The Frog Queen said...

LOL! That totaly made my day!!

That is why I go through the horrible (and I do mean horrible) ordeal of putting mine in the carrier.....oh the howling!!

I usually pop a couple of asprin BEFORE we head out....try to slow down the impending headache from the non stop b*tchin coming from the back seat.

You are a brave lady. I completely understand your situation and want to let you know that I will add you to my list of people I will post bail for!

:)

Cheers!

Jeanne said...

I think she was behind me on the highway tonight. She was so close the interior of my car lit up like a stage.

Did she say anything about some old lady flipping her off?

jadedj said...

We have different laws down here under the 49th parallel line. Other than humans, only pigeons can drive the car.

Kate on Clinton said...

Oh, too funny! Lola and Mr. Beans are very jealous - they never even get out of the crate to push the cart the vet around the corner.