Sunday, 23 December 2012

You Disappoint Me


Happy Festivus, everyone! You know, I bet even Grumpy Cat would enjoy Festivus or at least, the Airing of Grievances part.


And who doesn't have grievances to air at this time of year? The mistake that Christmas makes is trying to paper over resentments, anger and petty jealousies. "Let's all be nice -- it's Christmas!" The genius of Festivus is that it ritualizes the whole ugly process. In fact, maybe things are now getting a bit too bureaucratic. Check out this official notice form, LOL! (click on it to embiggen).


My major Grievance this year is not against any family member, friend or blog buddy. Nope, I'm going full-on Big League. I'm calling out the most hated man in North America, the one who is currently denying us Canadians our very birthright: *snarl* Gary Bettman, Commissioner of the NHL.


Oh yeah, I know exactly where I want to stick that aluminum Festivus Pole, Bettman, you feckin bastid. Settle already, fer Chrissakes!

25 comments:

Laurie said...

good one! Merry Christmas!

Boho mom said...

Ha! I laughed out loud at this one! Do you know me & my close circle of friends have a "festivus for the rest of us" every year! It's so much fun, as we share our grievances about annoying family members and laugh and support each other throughout.
Great pics!!!

mrsduncanmahogany said...

Ha, ha!! Good one! Happy Festivus!

jadedj said...

Bah! We don't need no niceyness! Laughing in between gulps of java trying to "embiggen" my caffeineless brain. LOVE that word, embiggen!

Jane of The Jewels said...

Poor George - no wonder he's so messed up! That Grievance form is a riot!

Plowing Through Life (Martha) said...

Hahahaha...this was one of my favourite things on Seinfeld! Love that form!!!

heartinhand said...

FESTIVUS!
I know I may have to hand over my Canadian citizenship, but I'm happy there is still no hockey. My hubby has an addiction. I guess if I was asked to be truly generous though, I'd also wish for it's return, just to make him (and you) happy.
I might have to go all Grumpy Cat though.

Ken said...

We're going to spend Boxing Day with my mother's side of the family. I may need to print off a whack of Grievance forms to take along to pass out.

Thank goodness the World Juniors is on now. It's nice seeing some hockey on the TV again. :)

Caroline said...

Happy Festivus! Oh...I need one (or maybe a whole stack) of those grievance forms!

Leeanna Henderson said...

Happy Festivus!!! I need to copy that grievance form for me against my weird and very dysfunctional family.

Sulky Kitten said...

I need those forms - it's the only kind of paperwork I'd enjoy!

Kal said...

Everytime I see Bettman I think of what Frank Constanza said..."Me and this other man reached for the same doll...AS I RAINED BLOWS UPON HIM I knew there had to be a better way."

Happy Festivas

Magic Love Crow said...

Good one Debra!!! Merry Christmas ;o)

DEZMOND said...

Merry Xmas, Debs!

jaz@octoberfarm said...

i bet you like my post today! i am so fed up with this season!

laughingwolf said...

i despise bettjerk as much as the next person does... BUTT... he's NOT what's causing the prob... it's the majority of ASSHEAVY owners! GRRRR

my proposal, as i posted on fakebook [my spelling] some time back: CANCEL the nhl, set up an all-canadian hockey league [to which we may add good players from anywhere]... our game/our rules, our rink sizes

for a long time i've preferred junior hockey to the b.s. league - have you been to one? every few minutes a whistle blows, usually for no good reason, other than commercials! players mull around, not playing hockey, losing the momentum attained before the whistle

in a junior game, play goes on, quickly, after a whistle... i know, useta wuz a goal judge...

Linda Wildenstein said...

Hey crazy woman....let's air some grievances and tip a few. I'm all in on this one. Oma Linda

Riot Kitty said...

I need to get that form and carry it in my pocket to fill out at will :)

Jeanne said...

I second that motion! Nothing worse than a winter going by without HOCKEY!!!!

Introverted Art said...

oh Festivus would just not be good in my family...not good at all ;-)

G. B. Miller said...

I gave up on pro hockey the nano-second the Hartford Whalers moved to South Carolina (yeah, that's a hot bed of hockey for ya), but I agree, Bettman is a total richard.

How many sports leagues do you know of that will do their best impersonation of the Black Knight from Monty Python's "The Holy Grail" and expect fans/advertisers come crawling back and forgive them?

Twice.

JACKIESUE said...

I always wanted to just slap the shit out of him.

Crack You Whip said...

We have the Ice Gators--not even sure if they count as a professional hockey team. Chomp, chomp, chomp. (That's our own thing).

Lois said...

So sad for all you Hockey lovers! My daughter-in-law is in the same boat, hockey withdrawal. I am happily oblivious, but can sympathize.

SUZY8-TRACK said...

I love Festivus!...and now for the feats of strength!