Thursday, 23 May 2013

My One Athletic Ability

Well, after HRH's stinging rebuke yesterday, I feel compelled to write one final post on this topic to defend myself. I'm not a COMPLETE slug, you know. I do have ONE athletic ability.


It's true -- I cannot run, skate, throw, jump, kick or do any other thing requiring physical skill or endurance. When I was a kid at school, I was always picked third-last for sports teams (believe it or not, there were two other kids who were even worse at sports than me, the poor bastards). Nor do I really understand the point of sports or physical exercise. It's always been a mystery to me why people would want to spend their precious, precious leisure time engaging in such activities.

But on the other hand, I do have very good hand-eye coordination. So I'm not bad at pseudo-sports like shooting pool, which does not require any real athletic skill. Consequently I've invested a fair amount of time in becoming a decent pool player. Also, it gave me something to do when I was young and hanging out at the local lesbian bar hoping to meet chicks. There's only three ways to pass time at a gay bar -- drink, dance or shoot pool. I'm not much of a drinker or dancer, so that left only one thing.

But I might as well be ABSOLUTELY truthful. These days, I'd probably prefer racking up some lovely cupcakes instead --


Mmmm, cupcakes.

30 comments:

Laurie said...

Those are beautiful cup cakes, I wish I had good eye hand skills, thats something I was never good at, my husband was pretty good though,

jaz@octoberfarm said...

wow...these are so cool!

Francie M said...

Hahahahaha. One of my duties at the Museum is to classify things I see in old photos. And I'm often stumped by "sports" like pool. I must look it up. But - eating cupcakes - well any fool knows that is the most important sport!!

DEZMOND said...

if ever they organize cupcake making olympics, we should apply, Debs

knitwit said...

I was always picked dead last in gym, AND I never really learned how to play pool either. Obviously, I should've spent more time at the gay bar. Who knew?!
Thanks for these posts--I've been giggling all morning. Give me a bag of chips and some decent TV any day!

Jeanne said...

Love the cupcakes! Now that's my kind of exercise!

Adam said...

I haven't played pool in a long time

turquoisemoon said...

Awesome! Cupcake sports... I can do that!

A Beer For The Shower said...

Brandon's the pool hustler. Me, I'll take those cupcakes... As consolation for not being able to sink a single shot.

Suzanne said...

YUM!
I am sure what you lack in physical ability you make up for with wisdom and beauty

thediarist.net said...

I often joke that when the dance gene passed me by, I was supposed to get the pool gene. Sadly, I got neither.

I tend to like women who can play pool, though. Which is a sport, if you do it right. ;)

Leeanna Henderson said...

I only dance really good when I'm drunk. I can play pool too.
Anywho, the cupcakes are yummy lookin.

Linda Wildenstein said...

Love pool. The first couples date out after SM and I got married was to a pool hall and lounge. "He" was going to teach me how to play. When I ran the table, he and the other guy went off to sit at the bar. Tee Hee...didn't know I had some mad pool skills. He also did the same thing with chess and he won't play that with me anymore either. But I bet he'd eat the cupcakes with me. They look wonderful. Oma Linda

Betty said...

Those look great! The only sports I could do well at was dodge ball. I couldn't hit you but I could get out of the way fast. I suck at pool and baking though.

Plowing Through Life (Martha) said...

Hehehe...I love the way this ends! And eating cupcakes can be considered exercising. Some physical activities include leaning over (or bending over) to take a cupcake, lifting it up, taking bites and chewing... Many muscles are being used during this process, you know :)

Guillaume said...

I am rubbish at pool. Except sometimes when I am drunk.

Kellie @ Delightfully Ludicrous said...

I'm only good a pool when I've had a few drinks. I don't know why, but when I'm the most likely to topple over and crack my head open on the edge of the pool table, that's when I play the best.

Introverted Art said...

let's just say that when it comes to my athletic skills, I was not pick out first.

Lisa said...

anything requiring co-ordination is too much for me- the cupcakes on the other hand i could complete in under 10 minutes !

Riot Kitty said...

Pool is a great skill. The first time I played, at age 5, I just knocked the balls out of the way with my cue. I want a cupcake now.

Doug Jamieson said...

Ah, dessert. After all this gruelling fitness talk, something I can get into.

mrsduncanmahogany said...

Cool cakes! Don't worry about HRH's comment - everyone is good at something! ;)

laughingwolf said...

does 'pocket pool' count? ;)

Cheryl said...

What a cute idea for cupcakes.

As for you having good hand-eye coordination...I am totally jealous. I am a KLUTZ. Cant' shoot pool, my bowling is laughable even in aerobics class when everyone is moving left, I am moving right.

I do have some strengths but none of them depend on me not tripping over something from time to time.

The Happy Whisk said...

Love the cakes. Very cool.

Magic Love Crow said...

You got me with the cupcakes! My brother is amazing at pool! He even has his own stick!

JACKIESUE said...

when I was a bad girl back in the sixties I used to play pool to pay for my drug habit..which was really not all that much, but I did get to be pretty damn good.

Jim said...

Luckily I loved to DANCE! And besides there were no lesbian bars at the time, so therefore no pool tables to be had!!
Now to the important issue at hand....I WANT THOSE CUPCAKES!!!

Frostbite and Sunburn said...

Yep, cupcakes all the way!

Wicked Witch of the North said...

I suck at pool. I'm infamous for hitting people with flying balls. Yes, I said it.

However, if cupcake eating were a sport I'd blast everyone out of the water!