Wednesday, 17 January 2018

Maybe I'll Take Up Needlework Again


I learned how to embroider when I was 12. On a set of pillowcases, I embroidered a lovely pair of kittens playing among multicoloured daisies. Then later in my 30s, I took up cross-stitch. I embroidered towels, a baby bib and an amazingly beautiful baby blanket, if I do say so myself. But I gave up cross-stitch when I decided it was too sedentary a hobby and that I really needed to do something more physically active for my health.

I quite enjoyed doing counted cross-stitch, but I did find the range of available patterns to be very off-putting. They all seemed to be either appallingly cutesy and juvenile, or barf-inducingly sentimental, or uber-Christian-religious in nature. Sometimes all three at once!

However, a lot can change in 30 years . . . .

The contemporary "craftivist" movement has now inspired a whole new generation of subversive and/or feminist cross-stitchers to do relevant, humorous, ironic embroidery suitable for our day and age! Now, tell the truth, wouldn't any one of these pieces look delightful on your wall or on a cushion?










Good thing I saved all my embroidery floss, hoops and needles, isn't it? I feel inspired!

**Late-Breaking Addition to this Post!**

Dezzy of Hollywood Spy suggests adding this magnificent piece of cross-stitch art! And of course HRH approves!


48 comments:

Mitchell is Moving said...

If mother were still alive I’d ask her to make all of these for me. And I’ll bet she would too!

strangelynaked.com said...

Well, we could use something new to decorate our baby daughter's room, so if you want to cross-stitch a "smash the patriarchy" thing, I would happily hang it up in her room.

anne marie in philly said...

I got a t-shirt for the holidays that says "smash the patriarchy!"

"I knit so I don't kill people" is my motto.

I would put any of those pieces in my house. esp. the "hello kitty one".

LL Cool Joe said...

Haha, I can't wait to see yours! So to speak. ;)

Bob Slatten said...

I could have any of these in our house and be pleased as punch!

A Heron's View said...

Well, strangely it was the men in my family who did the embroidery, for most of them were either sailors (deep sea fisher men) or lighthouse keepers and I a landsman have several times taken up the craft .

jaz@octoberfarm said...

haha...these are great!

Jeanne said...

Well...now that you mention it...a hobby would be good. It beats feeding pigeons in the park!

Marie Smith said...

Lol. Cross stitch patterns have come a long way since I last looked for them!

Jim Serrett said...

Oh, you must do “S**t Happens”

Joanne Noragon said...

Homines sugere: Before I was thirty I devised that little homily, and my sister in law and I each stitched up a sampler for our husbands to use for coasters, or what not. I have zero knowledge of Latin; it was my best rendition of men suck. I was thirty forty five years ago. Carry on.

laurie said...

lol,, oh my gosh,, my sisterinlaw has done a couple of the ones you have shown here lol,,,,

Kay G. said...

Crochet! Please do so, you will love it! I have seen "I crochet so I don't kill people". Thought that was written just for me.

P.S. I can tell you some of the BEST crochet blogs, they are very creative!

Harry Hamid said...

The world needs more cushions with attitude. Long overdue.

Frank said...

Love the new sentiments, but embroidery is still too homespun for my taste. But I say go for it...better than killing someone.

The Happy Whisk said...

I loved the so happy I could puke.
That's great fun.
But the Homo Sweet Homo, made me
laugh out loud and that was great.

Happy Retirement. You're so funny.

lady M said...

I am looking forward to the designs you create!

DEZMOND said...

I swear I thought you did this one the first I saw it years ago: https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CjpmmQ3WUAIgsfS.jpg

Leeanna Henderson said...

I've been thinking about getting back into cross stitch again. Now I have a reason.

Jenn said...

Those are all fantastic..I would start cross stitching just to make those for myself. I lol'ed at the Lisa Simpson one! Love it!!

brewella deville said...

My mom left behind a lot of those hoops and quilt frames. They're probably still there, her sisters haven't walked away with those, too (a whole other story). When I see things like this it inspires me to get creative until I remember needlecraft isn't my strong point.

Miss Val's Creations said...

These are fantastic! My favorite would be the Simpsons one. It resonates right now! I love how crafting has evolved over the years to become appealing to younger souls. I have a knitting book named Stitch n' Bitch and the patterns are cool and written with a lot of humor.

Karen Ann said...

LOL.. I like your style.

e said...

My crafty daughter has done some of those! They are truly subversive and I LOVE them!

klahanie said...

Hey Debra,

You most certainly should take up needlework again. Such inspiring ideas to be seen.

I went to the comedy knitting workshop. Had me in stitches!

Take care, eh!

Gary 😀

Adam said...

Art and hardwork were never up my alley

Willym said...

I can just imagine my mother - with that pursed lipped look that Laurent says I get sometimes (????) - saying: But would you want them hanging on your wall, dear?

Syl (There's Bats In My Coffee) said...

Hahaha! These are awesome. I was actually thinking of cross stitching myself. I found some cool Addams family ones.

Plowing Through Life (Martha) said...

HAHAHA! If these don't inspire you to take up this hobby again, I don't know what will... !!

jadedj said...

I love these. I want one that reads, I LOVE MY SHITHOLE.

lgsquirrel said...

"I cross stitch so I don't kill people". I can relate. I totally respect you for that but I would still feel better if you put those sharp needles down and put the scissors back in the drawer.

Barbara said...

I've heard there is a way to take any picture and run it through some kind of software and it makes your picture into cross-stitch. I can't remember where I heard it but totally sounds like something that could be true. I love to cross-stitch and plan to take it up again when I get my cataracts taken care of.

Elsie Amata said...

I used to cross-stitch too. Way back in the day. I tried to pick it up again several years ago and tried to get my youngest into it too, but meh. We both lost interest and found the beach (and Netflix) way more appealing. Who knew that they had such updated patterns these days? Not this chick!

Have a beachy week!
Elsie

MrsDuncanMahogany said...

I just LOVE the "smash the patriarchy" one! Where my hoop?!?

Missy George said...

Love the last one!! I used to do Crewel, Embroidery, Counted Cross stitch..Cross stitched some quilts..Never saw any of those in my travels ;)..Times change!!

Susan said...

I was going to say that a hobby might keep you out of trouble, but I'm not so sure about that. I love the last one. I would hang it in my office just to irritate everyone.

John M said...

They seem so difficult to do. I like the wording.

Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...

Oh yes, the last one makes this collection complete.
Have fun, Debra. (I've never done embroidery but used to love doing needlepoint and latch-hook.)

Guillaume said...

I adore the last one. Oh and my mum does knitting.

Ol'Buzzard said...

Love that last one
the Ol'Buzzard

Magic Love Crow said...

Debra, what would I do without you! LOL! I have to admit, I have only did cross stitch once, but mom does it. I think it would be hilarious, if she made one of these! LOL! If you do any, you have to show!!! Love the added one at the end! Brilliant! Big Hugs!

Magic Love Crow said...

I just showed mom your post and she laughed! LOL!

bill lisleman said...

Rebel stitchers

Lynn said...

These are all so great! I think you should stitch that last one for HRH.

Fundy Blue said...

Haha! I'd love to see what you'd choose to cross stitch, Debra! LOL My Grandmother MacBeath tried to interest me in the embroidery arts, but I was too ADHD. It's going to be fun to see how you tackle retirement! Have a good one!

AntiquityTravelers said...

now that is some cross stitch I can get behind ;)

Insomniac's Attic said...

If you don't do the F@CK one then I guess I'll have to. lol

baili said...

these ones are SCARY to me

stitching is something which i never took as hobby
reminds me my childhood when women of my village used to do lots of gosip while doing this and their mouth run faster than hands lol