Tuesday, 1 January 2019

Happy New Year!


Typically, January 1st is the morning when I wake up and realize that all my holiday overindulgence has come home to roost.


Yes, it's time to pay the piper. You know what I mean -- the dreaded "D word."


I will be strong! I will deny myself! I can do it!



I will be vigilant! There will be no snaccidents!


And I will get to a gym! Pronto!




But then, all the rationalizations and excuses will start to kick in.



And all of a sudden, the old bod doesn't seem that bad after all.


So by the end of today, this will be my defiant New Year's stance --


Hey, where'd that nonsense about "sober" come from?

53 comments:

mistress maddie said...

Happy New Year tootes.

Just yesterday I saw 6 people exercising and jogging out my window. And I thought to myself, I really should get up and get another glass of champagne.

DEZMOND said...

My resolution for 2019 is to loose 5 kilos, I've got 7 more to go :)

Rosemary said...

Happy New Year Debra - me too, but unfortunately it will have to wait until I have finished the Christmas cake!!!!

by JFM said...

New Year's Resolutions are for weaklings.
I defy them openly, so why bother making them.
I will just be me...it makes life easier for those around me :)

Great post!
Happy New Year Debra πŸŽŠπŸŽ‰

anne marie in philly said...

I take "blackshuckofficial's" stance! HNY everyone!

Harry Hamid said...

Nice.

Anyway, if we stuck by our guns and became perfect this year, then what would we have as our resolution next year?

I'm just thinking long-term.

mxtodis123 said...

Happy New Year. A new year, a new beginning. I love it.

mshatch said...

Now that I have a dog again, I'll get lots more exercise. For some reason, it's easier with a canine friend :) Happy New Year

Marie Smith said...

Love the donut one but I don’t like donuts!

Jim Serrett said...

Funny Stuff! Happy New Year πŸΎπŸ‘❤️ Have a great 2019❣️

Deedles said...

The donut one killed me! I used to have a T-shirt that read "Inside this body is a skinny woman crying to get out. I ate her." I outgrew that shirt years ago.

Joanne Noragon said...

Too old for resolutions. I've said that for years. Happy new year to you.

BootsandBraids said...

All the best in 2019 to you! and I have got to have that Proverb running shirt. Heading off now to research the internet for it.

Leanna said...

I'm wondering if I have cancer or some kind of disease that is making the pounds slide off me. If it don't kill me then I intend to market this shit. I gotta make some bucks somehow. I loved the tweet from Jamie Kenney. I read it to David in my Scottish voice he thought it was kinda sexy. So now I'm sorta speaking in tongues. He thinks it's hawt. Wait til I say something in my butchered French. He's gonna lose it.
BWAAAAHAHAHAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAHAHAHAAAHAHAAA! Damn! I tinkled muhself again.

Leanna said...

Happy New Year, darlin. *smooches*

AntiquityTravelers said...

ha! yea, I'm not much for New Year's resolutions ... they just upset me in a few weeks when I realize that it was never going to happen anyway ;)

Willym said...

As we both used the "button extension" to do up our dress shirts last night a decision was made to change a few eating habits. Wish us luck!

CraveCute said...

My spouse buys donuts at the day old bakery outlet, I try to throw them out to the raccoons and squirrels as soon as possible! We are of the same age and it gets harder to keep the pounds from creeping on. Good luck with your quest and Happy New Year!

coffeeontheporchwithme said...

I laughed when I saw the Canadian Tire flyer, and all the exercise equipment is on sale. -Jenn

Martha said...

HAHAHA! Love these :)
Happy New Year!

Guillaume said...

Happy new year! Regarding weight gain and dieting, my mum once told me something very wise: don’t worry about what you eat between Christmas and the New Year, check what you eat between New Year and Christmas.

e said...

Love the memes, and love your readers' responses!

Wishing you all the best for 2019, whether you make/break resolutions or just go merrily on with your life. xoxox

Carol Blackburn said...

Thanks for my first laughs of the new year. That's promising.

Bob Johns said...

Hey, laughing burns calories!

Sandy said...

LOL!! Have seen a few of those funnies before, but LOVED the favorite machine at the gym. Thanks for the laugh.

Missy George said...

I thought the dreaded word that began with a D was diet! Yes, the holidays take their toll. Happy new year to you! Thanks for the funnies !

Rain said...

Hee hee hee hee hee...those are a blast Debra! I never make resolutions! I am feeling the food coma this morning, that's for sure and I'm sure I've gained my "winter" weight already lol...I'll end up losing it when the warmer weather comes along and I'm more active, so I don't bother worrying about it! Sober???? NEVER!!! ;) Oh my gosh, now I have a name for what I do...snackciddent...I had a few of those lately lol...in the form of a whole box of Turtles, then a big bag of Hershey Kisses!!! :) I wouldn't have it any other way!!! :)

Jill said...

LOL, these gave me a smile today, thank you! Hope you are having a wonderful New Year's Day!

Blessings,
Jill

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Those were funny, I never had to worry about what I ate and I used to be pretty good about it; however now I slip up a lot and my tummy tattles on me by sticking out over my belt. :(

Bea said...

'Snaccidents' makes me chuckle. :)

Moving with Mitchell said...

These are priceless. Jerry will want to print them out and plaster them all over his office.

peppylady (Dora) said...

After stopping your blog I believe I will treat my self to chocolate brandy truffle.
Wishing you many blessings in 2019

^.^ said...

XMas travel blog is finished … http://ckpeacemaker.wordpress.com/ … Happy XMas and Happy New Year and all dat jazz, friend D … Love, cat.

Barbara said...

Wonderful. You had me splitting a gut all the way through. Great way to start the New Year.

LL Cool Joe said...

It's going to take me until next Christmas to lose the bloody extra pounds I've put on this Christmas.

Happy New Year to you!

Bob Slatten said...

Love those, but ... "I have given my answer" will make me giggle for days.

MrsDuncanMahogany said...

:) I have given my answer. THIS is going to be my 2019 answer for just about everything.

Happy 2019!

Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...

My loving heart always wants me to eat forever too. You're supposed to follow your heart, right?

Enjoy divine eats this year.

Rommy said...

I can't stand being inactive, some I'm always exercising in some shape or form. But carbs... I just can't quit you! (Especially rice!)

SmitoniusAndSonata said...

What's wrong with being cuddly, anyway?

Linda said...

Happy New Year Wise One. Hope 2019 holds special treats for you and yours.

Kirk said...

HHappy New Year!

Miss Val's Creations said...

Happy New Year! Great funnies here.

Elsie Amata said...

Amen! I've gained at least fifteen pounds in the last five months because of my med change and was like, "Oh my gosh! Nothing fits! I look so fat!" Then I thought about it. Who cares? I'm almost fifty years old. I don't need to parade around in a bikini anymore. I'm good. Now pass me some chocolate cake. :)

Elsie

holli said...

I had to go to Dr on New Years Eve and of course the second you walk in door, they weigh you. NOT the best idea to start a new year but WHATEV's! I am going to stay plump and not even pretend to diet this year. Round is a Shape so I am in shape!

Jenn said...

Happy New Year Debra! I feel this post on a deep level. lol

Adam said...

I know gym staff hate this time of year.

Ol'Buzzard said...

Does my butt make these pants look big?
the Ol'Buzzard

Magic Love Crow said...

Happy New Year Debra! Never change! I love ya! LOL! Sending out many blessings to you for 2019!!! Big Hugs!

Fundy Blue said...

You always find the best funnies. Debra! Thanks for this inspiring post ~ LOL!

The Blog Fodder said...

My doctor told me to eat and walk. I am better at one of them

The Happy Whisk said...

I enjoyed those. My top pick goes for the doughnut/salad one. Too funny. Happy 2019!

Liz Hinds said...

Just devoured a whole huge box of Maltesers on the grounds that the sooner I eat them the sooner they'll be gone and I can d***.