Monday, 7 February 2011

Wikikittyleaks


Hello. It's me again, Her Royal Highness, blogging in the middle of the night from a top secret location for my own safety.

You readers think Debra She Who Seeks is sooooooooo nice and sweet, don't you? Well, she's got you completely bamboozled, you poor gullible saps. Just be glad you're not me! *sob*

That Beyotch-with-a-capital-B is a total tightwad cheapskate when it comes to gushie food. Oh sure, I have 24/7 access to a big bowl of prescription dry kibble but the key words there are prescription and dry -- yecchhh! Of course I choke it down out of necessity, but what I really want is beautiful moist gushie food. Anything with poultry is my fave although I also accept tuna and salmon in a pinch. But all that miserable Scrooge gives me is one tiny dish of gushie food per day. And even then I have to nag her relentlessly for a couple of hours first.

Can I come and live with you and eat as much gushie food as I want all day long? I'll be the best kitty you ever had! Please?


24 comments:

Snap said...

Well, Your Royal H .... no luck here ... Teddy and Cassie get the dry prescription stuff, too ... although Cassie is allowed a treat every now and then.

Suzie Ridler said...

Oh my GOD you crap me up! I mean, Her Royal Highness. Damn, I needed that today, thanks!

Jeanne said...

Oh you poor neglected Kitty! How you are deprived! Maybe if you could sneak away, I could smuggle you some gushie food......

Sarah said...

My dear Royal H...well hon..you would nots be happy with mys trained human..as she only feeds me the kibble stuff...ever. Well ok now and again I gets the gushie stuff...but only as a treat..and really...I only like the gravy part. Is you on a diet? I likes the cheese she gives me nibbles of now and again..even those it is nots good for me really. Hang in there kits, Tink

Jim said...

HRH, I'll send you a one-way ticket ASAP!!! How cruel of She who Seeks....what is she seeking anyway! Certainly not good CAT FOOD for you. Poor thing.....

Cinner said...

Have you no shame, she saved your life I am sure, She who Seeks is a highly intelligent person whom gives you much lovee.......here cats get no moist food, unless they catch a mouse, and they have no computer priviledges.....ring, ring....deb your cat is up to no good, signed anonymous caller. lol

mxtodis123 said...

Miss Minga heartily agrees with you. She wants the moist and chewy stuff.
Mary

Lois said...

We just switched our cats to prescription food to and they are a little confused...

My Grama's Soul said...

I don't have a cat...I have a sweet little dog....but I must say...yours is adorable.

Jo

Twain12 said...

i'm sorry you have to put up with that kind of abuse, but i don't think you would like my doggies

Willym said...

HRH - you should come to our place - Nick and Nora get Tuna at every meal - along with the dry stuff. Yep tuna... good old fashioned packed in water Tuna. And hell they're dogs! Now only problem is that "Kill the cat!" chant Nora sets up every time she sees the moggie downstairs.

Tara said...

Yes, I abuse my poor doggies in the same fashion. Mean, mean Mommy.

That cell photo is hilarious!

Aunt Amelia's Attic said...

Ohhh poooor *Your Royal Highness*! Just the so-called-*goooooooood* stuff, in unlimited amounts. The really yummmy stuff, only a bit of.

I UNDERSTAND! I'm on the same plan. And it stinks! It really, really stinks! -pout-

Aunt Amelia's Attic said...

Weeeeeeeeee, you are a Dianna Rigg lover from way back tooooooooooo! O yes, "The Avengers", the old black and white ones, were how we found her. Rigg's "Mrs. Peel" was a sexy strong woman, who didn't have to have big booooobs. I loved it! [Only time I had em, was while I was nursing kids!]

And I was a total fan for years.
Heck, I still am!

We even went on a quick trip to NYC, to see her in a play. The one where she appeared naked for 1 and 1 1/2 seconds. lol.

She's one year younger than me, cause I think her bio said she was born in 1938. Mmmmmm, she's in a hell of a lot better shape than I am of course. But then, all of those actors have had plastic surgery of some sort, I think. ,-)

But anyway, saw a pic of her, kind of recent, and she still has the signature bangs and face-hugging-bob. But it's looks as if it's her now natural gray locks. Hooooray for her! ,-)

Hey, did you ever see her in an absolutely terrifying BBC mini-series, about a psychopath woman, who started killing, when she was just a kid. And in the present, she was trying to poison her "grands," with poisoned marzipan. I can never seeeeeeeee even the word 'marzipan,' without thinking of that show!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Found the link. It was 'Mother Love' for the BBC. Must get my hands on that disc!!!! ,-)

Wendy said...

Your RH, you are most welcome to visit us and share our treats. My sister, Sele is a little on the "curvy" side if you know what I mean, and so mom has this stupid bowl out with our crunchy food, where we have to stick our paws through and get a piece at a time, ridiculous! But we do have real MEAT and get dried chicken treats as well. So please stop by for some good catnip and real gushie meat. Miss Bella and Sele

BugginWord said...

You "crap" me up too. I'm not sure what that meant but it made me giggle so hard gushie food came out my nose.

laughingwolf said...

mmmmmmmmmmmmaybe ;) lol

JeannetteLS said...

LIsten up, there, Your RH-ness. As my mother would say, don't you know there are starving kitties in the Sudan who would just LOVE the dry sawdust you are fed? Oh, you naughty kitty. Some cats are forced to kill mice for food, and do tricks and if they stretch and dig their claws innocently enough into some hooman's lap, are summarily tossed onto the floor. Now shape up there kitty and maybe, just maybe, she who seeks shall seek your opinion in this and give you one lovely crystal stemmed bowl of the mushy stuff garnished with a lovely shrimp.

or not.

LauraX said...

One of our two kitties absolutely refuses to eat dry food...will go on hunger strikes if we don't give her chicken pate...not the chunky stuff, no she won't eat that! The other kitty will eat ANYTHING. And our dog takes out the kibble, drops it on the floor in search of soft bits in her bowl...when she runs out of soft bits, she will eat the left over kibble. Well, who can blame them...actually, it all looks pretty yucky to me!

Holly Ruggiero said...

You poor ill-treated kitty. Maybe your human is hard of hearing and you need to get right in her face.

mistress maddie said...

I just don't know Royal H, Debra does seem sweet. Are you sure about this? And I already have a dog so you may not like to live here, althought he would LOVE YOU!

Rue said...

Sorry HRH - my cats only get one small dish (more like 1-2 tablespoons) of gushie food a day. You'd not be happier here.

Nobody can have everything they want, Dearie. Except Lady Gaga. The real world stinks.

Ocean Breezes and Country Sneezes said...

Sorry HRH, mom is doing the right thing. Duke receives sensitive tummy kibbles . . .

YELLOWDOG GRANNY said...

Dexter and Rocky2 have sent her an open invitation to come see them aannnny time..