Friday, 30 August 2019

Farewell, Harry


[Photo of Harry from "The story so far" June 30, 2019]

I hate it when a blogging buddy passes away. And one of my faves did so earlier this week on August 27th -- Harry Hamid of The Rise and Fall of Harry Hamid.

Harry wrote prose -- strangely compelling, beautifully twisted, prose. He would come at subjects sideways, entertaining us with his surreal details, seducing us into entering his often macabre world of clever verbiage. His was a unique voice and I enjoyed reading his short stories very much.

Like many writers, Harry wanted to experience the world in other people's skins. When I first unknowingly encountered him a few years ago in the blogosphere, he was blogging as Katy, a beautiful, homeless lesbian who loved obscure rock bands and had an unfortunate love life (Katy's wife ran off with Katy's brother). Harry had also, it turned out, written other blogs in the personas of two different women.

A couple of years ago, when Harry came clean and revealed all (so to speak), he undertook to write his new blog in his own persona. We went with him on a new journey involving his struggles with love, life, alcohol, cigarettes and the Green Party. Then, tragically this Spring, there was a heart attack/stroke that nearly killed him, a cancer diagnosis, surgery, chemo, failing health and now death, as his brother advised us in a final post on his blog. Harry posted personal photos of himself in hospital, so thin, so frail, yet he always fought on, still writing on occasion.

A year ago, Harry noted in a blog post that this particular week in August is when everything bad always seems to happen to him --

"This week is my annual near death experience.

Jamie left. You know this. It’s been six years today. I almost died, five years next Monday. And it’s hurricane season in Houston.

In my life where nothing ever happens, everything that happens happens this week. There was the year when my car blew up. Yes, that one. I remember. I said, “Of course it did,” and all my co-workers laughed. At me. They said, “You’re superstitious after all, Harry.” That night, our server room exploded and the firemen ran up twenty-seven flights of stairs, each one wearing a hundred pounds of equipment and nothing was left but the ashes. The mayor came out. In tacky pajamas. I walked out under helicopters and the world stank sharp with electrical fire.

This was no surprise. I’d warned them. This was the anniversary of everything.

Nothing is cursed and no week and no one. You will always find a logical explanation. That’s the rule. No magic, no magic at all. So okay then, let’s have it then. I’m game.

Logical Explanation 1. There exists a strange cabal of very cruel people who are targeting me. They blew up my truck and they blew up the server room, damn them. Made Jamie leave, and Ruby. Got Veva to marry. Chose the day for my new firm to gobble up my old. Alright.

But what about the hurricanes? What about my total loss of platelets and sitting at lunch, watching my arm fill up with blood in 2013? What a strange cabal that would be.

This is the part where I get to Logical Explanation 2 and it’s the one where, in my paranoid state, I’m bringing it all upon myself. My paranoia stirs up storms! Breaks underground pipes. It kills my grandfather and the world goes up in sympathetic explosions. No good, no good, that seems even more fantastical than a curse, Occam’s razor and all that jazz.

I’ll stay in, with the lights out, this year. Maybe I will call a priest. A handyman. An anesthetist. Dial 9 and 1 on my phone in preparation. In expectation. While I’m waiting."

And now in 2019, during his bad luck anniversary week, Harry has indeed died. Rest in peace, my friend.

But you know, a very real part of me hopes that he has simply pulled another literary fast one on us -- that in a little while, he'll reappear in some new persona in a new blog, saying "Sorry! ha ha! THIS is the real me now!"

Wouldn't that be great? Yeah, yeah it would.

Universe, make it so.

39 comments:

John Going Gently said...

A lovely tribute
Xxx

baili said...

Dear Debra this is powerful tribute to your friend!

i found it overwhelmingly beautiful

may he rest in peace amen
it was nice to know such an amazingly lovely person my friend!

Sooo-this-is-me said...

I never connected with this blogger but he left comments on my blog. Well if he did pass then how sad. The hardest blog loss for me was Birdie of Bird of Paradise, she was an actual person, a beautiful person, many had the pleasure of meeting her. I'm almost moved to tears every time I look back at an old post and she is there supporting me.
Seems common that people blog in another voice, it's happened before, doesn't bother me, I figure it or long before they tell me...

Linda said...

Beautiful Debra.

Farewell Harry Hamid. You will be missed.

Marie Smith said...

Great tribute, Debra. So sorry about your blog friend!

Lady M said...

What a heartbreaking story. What a strong person Harry was to blog about his illness. I am sorry to be so late to the table. Your blog is a beautiful tribute Debra.

Kirk said...

I'm struggling to come with a synonym for "lovely" so it doesn't seem like I'm copying John, but he nailed it. Sorry for your loss.

^.^ said...

May your friend rest in peace, D. Much love, cat.

Bob said...

Lovely.
I really enjoyed the blog and was shocked when I read that last post.
He will be missed.
RIP
Safe travels

bobbie said...

I'm so sorry about your friend's passing ~ may he live on through his stories.
Hugs to you ~

DEZMOND said...

It seems like numerous Harrys died with the real one. RIP to a fellow blogger.

Leanna said...

I can only hope someone in the blogosphere will write beautiful tributes like this one for me when I go. Simply beautiful, Debra. Rest calmly, Harry.

This N That said...

Wonderful tribute..may he rest in peace..

e said...

Oh, Harry! I hope the end was peaceful.
Thank you for the eulogy, Debra...

dinthebeast said...

I've been telling the proprietors of the blogs where he commented, and where I first discovered him (as Nasreen) of his passing.
Thank you for this post, I had forgotten about the late August curse.

-Doug in Oakland

Travel said...

Sorry I missed his blog. Thank you for the tribute.

Joanne Noragon said...

Thank you, Debra, for remembering him.

Parnassus said...

Hello Debra, I am very sorry to hear about your friend--what an ordeal he went through, and how well he faced it! There is something especially poignant about losing a blogger so suddenly this way. Blogging is intensely personal, yet different from typical essay writing. An important voice has been stilled.
--Jim

Parnassus said...

Hello again, I just read some of the entries in Harry Hamid's blog. I never came upon his blog before, although I recognize a number of the commenters. He had a beautiful writing style, bordering on the poetic. He had a brilliant mind, and I wish I could have explored it in real time while the posts were being published.

The most poignant part of reviewing Harry's blog was the "Subscribe" button at the top.
--Jim

SmitoniusAndSonata said...

Wherever he is now, I hope he finds it fascinating.

AntiquityTravelers said...

I've been away from blogging (again) for some time. And come to visit and found this lovely tribute to a blog friend ... he sounds like someone who touched many, not necessarily realizing it. So sorry to hear he's gone, and during his bad luck anniversary week. The universe truly is a strange creature

Sandy said...

Sorry for your loss. I wasn't familiar with her or his blogs. For those that enjoyed him, I hope you're right...he's writing under a new name.

Adam said...

I remember him, but I didn't know he was close to death. I'm sorry to hear that.

Susan Kane said...

He stayed being himself until the end. Such a brave soul.

Magic Love Crow said...

Debra, this is such a beautiful tribute to Harry! He is smiling!!! I still can't believe he is gone! Big Hugs!!!

Magaly Guerrero said...

Your conclusion speaks of my own feelings. I'm still waiting for the, "Ha!" I really, really do. We were supposed to make bald jokes and funny hair jokes to each other. We were supposed to talk about tubes stuck in funny (not funny haha) places. There were so many things I wanted to tell him about getting better. So many things...

The Blog Fodder said...

Blogger and Facebook friends can become as close as real flesh and blood reach out and touch you friends. I am sorry for your loss and you wrote a great farewell to him.

Rain said...

Sorry Debra xx

Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...

I'm very sorry, Debra.
Thank you for this heart-crushing tribute.
May Harry's memory be a blessing.

Anne Johnson said...

A sad day indeed. I'll miss him.

Ur-spo said...

I was wondering about this; I sensed it had happened.
I was just getting to know him too.
You paid him a lovely tribute.

Hena Tayeb said...

So sorry to hear of his passing..
But you and other people like you will be able to keep his memory alive. How wonderful this blogging world can sometimes be.

Bill Lisleman said...

I just visited his blog and read the sad news posted by his brother. Your last idea on this remembrance doesn't surprise me. I don't recall him mentioning Andy Kaufman in any of his posts or comments but I suspect he might have been influenced by Andy.

The Captain said...

Loved Harry's writing and I'm going to miss his stories.

Bohemian said...

A lovely moving Tribute to a really Talented Blogger and Man who impacted more people than he probably realized.

CraveCute said...

Debra, I've been out of sorts for the past year due to a variety of things. This post hit me hard. I feel the angst of poor Harry and I've also felt the "why me?" emotion myself this past year. But then I think why not me, things happen. The rain falls on all of us at one time or another. I hope the spirit of Harry has found a bright spot out there somewhere. Thanks for a great post and sharing this story about your friend.

Pam said...

I had the privilege of attending Harry/Jerry’s memorial service. It was a packed house including professional peers, family friends and children. Jerry was highly respected in the legal aid community and was described as non-judgmental, an active listener and an educator. The family was presented with a certificate from the Mayor declaring August 27 as Jerry Larson, Jr. Day. His brother Jeff gave a loving eulogy. He got teary at the beginning and the church deacon stepped up, wrapped an arm around Jeff and read the eulogy until he could continue. It was a touching moment. Jeff referred to Jerry’s heroes, favorite musicians and books. I remember Peter Gabriel, Roger Waters, William Burroughs and The Book by Alan Watts. I hope Jeff will post the text because the list was longer. Astro the cat has a good home. He lives with a delightful woman who has a young daughter that enjoys his furry companionship.

Debra She Who Seeks said...

@ Pam -- Thank you so much for this comment! I'm glad to hear that Harry's memorial service was such a wonderful and loving tribute to him, both personally and professionally. And I appreciate the update on Astro!

Magic Love Crow said...

I just read Pam's comment! Thanks for sharing Harry's service with us!!