For years I got tons of paper mail and email selling me burial plots. Then suddenly they stopped and I started getting bombarded with sales pitches for river cruises in Europe. They evidently gave up on my dying to please them.
What Boud said- hilarious- do not please the undertaker- ever! The clowns burring their friend is sort of a true story- "The american Way of Death" if the dead is too tall for the box, chop the feet off! yes, that happened.
I want a glitter paint bomb in with my ashes so any grave robbers get the Porch Pirate treatment! But just to be sporting, my epitaph will be "Fuck Around And Find Out".
Oh, these are all great but now, whenever someone says how good someone looks in a casket, I will have to stifle a giggle thinking of strawberry preserve.
Unicorn floatie and a sparkler. Sounds about right. I knew that guy once, an artist, who mixed unclaimed cremains into paint and painted with it. He said everyone had a subtly different color. We called him 'Wayne the cremains guy'.
37 comments:
For years I got tons of paper mail and email selling me burial plots. Then suddenly they stopped and I started getting bombarded with sales pitches for river cruises in Europe. They evidently gave up on my dying to please them.
What Boud said- hilarious- do not please the undertaker- ever!
The clowns burring their friend is sort of a true story- "The american Way of Death" if the dead is too tall for the box, chop the feet off! yes, that happened.
Superb!
They scattered Larry's ashes on the family farm, and the cows came over and licked him up off the ground.
HAHA - the cat!
I'd just like to put out on the curb for the recycling pickup. What they'll muse me for I do not know.
Hilarious, Debra.
Too funny. A friend of mine had everyone sing "Always Look on the Bright Side of Life" at the end of her funeral, it was beautiful.
Enjoyed them all, but the one about MP's song REALLY tickled my funny bone!! TFS ~
bobbie
PS ~ it also gave me a great idea!
Dear Debra, the ones I laughed 😅 🤣 😂 the hardest are the cats, the clowns 🤡 the strawberries and the tombstone typo. Thanks for sharing, dear friend.
LOL Boud. 😆
Hilarious, Debra! Maybe I'll mix my ashes with that left over bottle of glitter I have for teaching. 😂
The Monty Python sounded bizarre enough to be an urban legend, but multiple sources pointed out it's true...which is hilarious.
I like the glitter idea!
Ha! (Oh to be Boud.) These are hilarious. I’m now thinking about Pop Goes the Weasel.
These are excellent, especially the first one.
A grave mistake one is so witty
Macabre, but funny.
That first one is a major groaner!!!!!!!!!!!!! SIGH.......
But the boss one was pricless.
You sure have quite the sense of humor!
I want a glitter paint bomb in with my ashes so any grave robbers get the Porch Pirate treatment! But just to be sporting, my epitaph will be "Fuck Around And Find Out".
Ha, let's hope this finally diminishes the cliche use of "think outside the box" lol.
Oh, these are all great but now, whenever someone says how good someone looks in a casket, I will have to stifle a giggle thinking of strawberry preserve.
I liked the cat best.
Yup these are dark humor. I like idea of Monty python's Bight side of life song at a funeral. Better to make people smile and be a little surprised.
There one when corps arise out of the casket. And toss flowers there holding, and says "Who Next"
I love that "Always Look on the Bright Side of Life" is the UK's number one funeral song.
I rarely laugh at circus clowns, but I did this time.
All good ones, I like the idea of Always Look On The Bright Side of Life being sung at funerals. And being put to sea on a unicorn floaty.
I wonder if I could get away with either of those epitaphs.
Monty python has given us so much.
Bless them
Monty Python! That's a favorite! LOL
Unicorn floatie and a sparkler. Sounds about right.
I knew that guy once, an artist, who mixed unclaimed cremains into paint and painted with it. He said everyone had a subtly different color. We called him 'Wayne the cremains guy'.
They're all good but I love the strawberry jam!
Hard to pick just one!!!
All great ,out of the box is light one
Reminds me of the adverts on daytime TV, it's all life insurance and cremation only funeral plans.
Post a Comment