HER ROYAL HIGHNESS THE CAT
here once again.
A couple of weeks ago, my LAUGHABLY MISGUIDED human
suggested that perhaps she should turn this website into
a FOOD BLOG, of all things.
Believe me when I say that the ONLY one around
THIS dump with any GOURMET food experience
is YOURS TRULY.
So WHERE and HOW did I acquire
my impressive CREDENTIALS, you ask?
I have learned MUCH from the following:
(1) my INTERNATIONAL travels, and
(2) my extensive, in-depth, PRIVATE studies and training.
The only creatures MORE UNQUALIFIED than my human
to write a food blog are these RIDICULOUS POSEURS --
Anyway, enough about such WANNABES.
C'EST MOI who is the QUEEN of the KITCHEN.
I do ALL the cooking around here.
AND the hunting, I mean, GROCERY shopping, too.
Yes, I have many, MANY reasons to CONGRATULATE myself
on my EXTRAORDINARY culinary and fine dining abilities.
TOO many to list here, really (*modest blush*).
Despite PUBLIC DEMAND, however, I am NOT
going to do a food blog on the internet.
There is simply no GLORY, FAME or FORTUNE in that, I'm afraid.
I'm setting my sights HIGHER.
EN GARDE, you so-called celebrity chefs.
My RISE TO POWER is about to commence!