Wednesday, 8 December 2021

Lawyer Jokes


No one loves lawyer jokes 
more than actual lawyers.

We positively revel in how much 
people hate and misunderstand us.
 
Yup, that's just how we roll!



 
Blogger Debra She Who Seeks said...

I hope he makes a few buck-buck-bucks!

9/19/2021 08:46:00 PM

 Delete
Blogger WilliamRocket said...

... and feathered his nest.

9/19/2021 09:42:00 PM

Blogger Bicycle Bill said...

Sometimes specialization gets a little TOO specialized.  But I bet he ends up with a huge nest egg while his clients have to settle for chicken feed.

-"BB"-

9/20/2021 12:46:00 AM


And remember, 
judges are lawyers too!



I dedicate this post to The Blog Tech, who is
the son of blogging buddy Joyce (Octoberfarm).
He is currently in law school, so I'm sure
he's familiar with this classic summary
of that experience --

"In First Year Law, they scare you to death;
in Second Year Law, they work you to death; and
in Third Year Law, they bore you to death."

Have fun and enjoy the ride!


40 comments:

Boud said...

I love a lawyer who can laugh at lawyer jokes!

Sixpence Notthewiser said...

Hahaha
The 'did I go to Law School for this?' part is spot on. I have several friends who are lawyers and they love lawyer jokes. Really.
The law school creation myth one deserves its own t-shirt.

XOXO

jaz@octoberfarm said...

haha...i was reading this thinking i would forward it to TBT! thanks so much. i'm sure he will get a kick out of this!

Travel said...

When I was in law school, people were litigating if potbellied pigs could be kept as household pets in residential areas. In moments of despair I remind myself that "at least I didn't end up litigating pig cases".

Marie Smith said...

These are hilarious!

Bob said...

Oh, I swear ... each and every day, all day!!

Mistress Maddie said...

These are all great and made me chuckle. A friend of mine once sent me a meme that said he uses the law firm of Dewey Suem and Howe.

Debra She Who Seeks said...

@ Mistress Maddie -- My favourite law firm is Sue, Grabbit & Run.

blogtech said...

Thanks so much! Always loved the one about the guy who argued he served his death sentence.

-Blog Tech

Ol'Buzzard said...

My favorite lawyer: Better Call Saul.
the Ol'Buzzard

Mike said...

The one I remember is Dewey, Cheatum, and Howe.

Debra She Who Seeks said...

@ Mike -- Oh yeah, that's a good one too!

Parnassus said...

Hello Debra, People are quick enough to make jokes about lawyers--until they need one!
--Jim

e said...

That parrot visitation one made me laugh! Well, they all did. It's just so easy to take cheap shots at lawyers. And, curiously satisfying! My former neighbor was a judge and the phrase 'sober as a judge' absolutely NEVER applied to him!

DVArtist said...

Ha ha good ones.

Tundra Bunny said...

The only lawyer joke I can recall at the moment is: "What do you call a thousand lawyers chained together at the bottom of a lake? A good start!"..... Thanks for the LOLs with my morning coffee!

Linda said...

All funny, a bit of self-deprecation is healthy haha!
The parrot case is my favourite, and the cat has a Judge Judy look on her face.

Linda said...

I mean self-mockery, maybe I used the wrong expression?

Lady M said...

Ha - love that thing about the parrot.

yellowdoggranny said...

Im stealing the every fucking day one.

Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...

Good move with the "buck-buck-bucks" response!4
Q: What do you call 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?
A: A good start.
Sorry, you likely heard that too many times. I think the number is much bigger, but I kept it lower because you're a very good one.

Moving with Mitchell said...

I’ve known honest lawyers. I’ve known lawyers those “3” jokes were written about.

Q: What does a lawyer get when you give him Viagra?
A: Taller.

G. B. Miller said...

Now, now, now. Not all lawyers are bad. There are a few ethical ones. There's you...ummm....well, there's you!

You are our favorite lawyer!

The Blog Fodder said...

Divorce lawyer: Ditcher, Quick, and Hyde
How many lawyers to grease a combine? One if you run him through slowly.

Debra She Who Seeks said...

@ Moving With Mitchell -- That viagra one is new to me!

Debra She Who Seeks said...

@ The Blog Fodder -- Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear! *snort*

ashok said...

Hahaha! Too funny!

Liz Hinds said...

The parrot one made me laugh out loud!

Anne Johnson said...

I was accepted to law school but didn't go. The entrance exam bored me, and I had the foresight to think that the curriculum might do the same.

Kirk said...

You mean they're not all like Perry Mason?

Adam said...

I had to hire a lawyer for my divorce with Daisy. Not fun and very expensive

This N That said...

The hallmark sign is perfect/priceless! I love gnomes. I guess I will have to get mine out this year and dust them off.. The kitty judge is adorable if not a bit scary. Enjoy your weekend.

Miss Val's Creations said...

Law humor is classic! I love the prisoner who died and came back. A good lawyer could get him out of prison for serving a life sentence.

pam nash said...

Hmmm - Granddaughter #2 will be starting law school in the fall 2022. I'll have to pass on the expectations for law school, years 1, 2, 3.

Guillaume said...

All very funny ones. My favourite was about the judge.

Busy Bee Suz said...

Poking at oneself is the best therapy ever. :) These are Golden!

baili said...

haha i agree on that layers are misunderstood by people like so many other professions though in my personal opinion good and bad are everywhere and in every profession :)
hugs and blessings!

Rommy said...

I have to show these to my niece. She's following her dad's footsteps and gone off to law school.

Barbara said...

Good ones, especially Matthew Mcconaughey. I worked in law firms all my life so yes, I know.

Magic Love Crow said...

Excellent!!! LOL! Big Hugs!